Should?

 Whenever I used the word “should” when talking to myself, it was motivated by a lack of self-acceptance rather than encouragement. Some years ago I heard a wise person say "Please don't should on me." Should is a directive, not as encouraging as I prefer.

Can we share less should please?

 One overarching strategy for dealing with the experience of intense uncertainty is to do whatever you can to bring yourself back to the world of the finite – to things as they actually are in your own concrete world, and the concrete things you can control.

How do you work with this feeling?

Rules of Life

 7 Rules of life

1. Make peace with your past so doesn't effect your present

2. What others think about you is none of your business

3. Time fixes almost everything, so give it time

4. Don't compare your self to others or judge them. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

5. It's okay not to have all the answers they will come to you when you lest expect it

6. You are in charge of your own happiness

7. smile you don't own all the problems in the world

These are common and ones I subscribe to. What rules of life are yours?

Enjoying The Now

 Enjoy the NOW

I've been dating the same person for 16 weeks. It helps that we are both work alcoholics, very involved in our community and share same passions of helping people.  We've both had some unpleasant dating/relationships and we decided at the same time to take things slowly

Enjoying the NOW is our mantra.  Making and keeping time to share a meal, watch a show we both like, work on projects that fulfill us all in moderation.    Since our 'date night is Saturday evenings' we both look forward to making that our now time.

What helps you to enjoy the now?

Hope Over Despair

 For those new to my blog I'm a queer man living with AIDS.  HIV positive since mid 1980s and in 1993 got the official AIDS diagnosis.  I'll go over why I choose HOPE over DESPAIR later or you can just scroll though any former topics so see what I mean.  Today is different

During a discussion in the group Positive Attitudes we talked about an article in POZ magazine about brain disorders. 

I do have two brain disorders, the first being HIV encephalitis and the second PML

Add a minor stroke 13 years ago and I'm shocked that I can work full time.  Seriously until  I got the PML diagnosis just two years ago I was on disability. 

I choose HOPE over DESPAIR and found employment where i can share my work skills and life lessons

Where do you find angst and do you fight it or combat it? 

Road Signs

There are many street sings advising us/ME on what to do, what to avoid, how fast to go, etc

I thought it would be super if such signs existed for my life.  Who knows how I avoided "that wrong road" or made an incorrect turn without warning.  Turns out there were road signs in my life:

Mom is one of them. Her wisdom gained from growing up with a family like the one I did helped her see the dangers ahead.  I joined the Boy Scouts and they taught "Do your best" 

Now I'm in uncharted waters in my dating life.  Thanks to having had rough roads before I think I know what lies ahead

Still I'll take head on the future   What sign do you  follow?

Same Thing We Do Everynight Pinky

 The cartoon "Pinky and The Brain" is about perseverance.  Through mishaps they try and try and try again to "take over the world"    A key word that Brain says is "TRY"

As Winston Churchill said never give in, never give in, never, never, never, never

When work leaves me weary, I say "I'll try", when a date goes bad, I try again

What tools do you use to "Try and take over the world"